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Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Rex Ryan Or Bill Belichick: It's Hard To Like Either

Rex Ryan, is at it again.  The larger-than-life head coach of the New York Jets has opened the castle gates for war, against the New England Patriots in this Sunday's AFC Divisional game, by specifically targeting head coach Bill Belichick and calling it 'personal.'  This routine is getting boring.

Ryan called out the three-time Super Bowl winning coach by repeating his tired mantra, the P-Word.

"This week, this is about Bill Belichick vs. Rex Ryan," the rotund Jets coach said, " There's no question.  It's personal.  It's about him and myself, and that's what it's going to come down to."

"Personal."  We've heard that word come from Ryan's mouth too many times the past couple of weeks.

First, "It's personal" was repeated six times by Ryan at a press conference when news of a foot-fetish video, allegedly narrated by the head coach, was brought up.  The usually boisterous Ryan hid under the P-Word like a grilled suspect would plead the fifth. 

Next it was Ryan's tireless quest to beat Peyton Manning and the Colts had him uttering those those words.  Ryan was tired of losing to the quarterback and used the P-Word as motivation for his team.

Now, Ryan kicks the shins of Belichick, as the Jets prepare to face the Patriots at Gillette Stadium this Sunday, and calls it motivation.  Again, it's "personal."

Belichick, ever the, ahem,  jester, uncharacteristically volleyed back, " I might have a little quickness on him," he joked.  "He probably has a little strength and power on me."  That's about as much comedy styling as you'll get with the dour coach wearing his trademark dingy hoodie.

Ryan has uttered inflammatory words at the Patriots coach a few times.  Before their first game against the Patriots, he said, "I'm not here to kiss Belichick's rings." Even after last month's 45-3 beat down, Ryan came out with this tidbit, "Trust me, we will remember this."  Really?  How could you forget?

I can't think of any two people it's harder to root for.  It's like deciding who would you rather be stuck in an elevator with: Rosie O'Donnell or Joy Behar?  I'd rather be stuck in a locked men's room with a drunken Andy Dick if I had to make the decision between any of them.

Ryan's season long escapades have been widely publicized from his foul-mouthed episodes on "Hard Knocks," his wig-wearing press conference,  his handling of criminally-charged Jets players to the kinky foot tapes.  He continues to rock the boat and claims it takes the pressure off his team.  Picking on a coach with a 15-5 playoff record sounds like plopping a fatter early-season Ryan on the shoulders of the Jets.  Oh yeah, Ryan did finally exorcise the Manning demons last week--even though the Colts had 18 players listed on the injured reserve.

At the opposite end of the publicity-seeking spectrum is the hooded, personality-void, Belichick.  The sour-puss coach says about as much as the mute guy in Penn and Teller and he is about as funny as Dane Cook.  Belichick's insincere, two-finger handshake with former Jets coach Eric Mangini told you everything you care to know about the future Hall of Famer.  Everyone calls the Pats coach a genius but too many of his CIA tactics come into question. Remember the Spygate scandal?

Neither Belichick or Ryan are really well-liked by anyone but their own players.  They have split their four meeting since Ryan took over as the Jets' head coach and if history is any indicator, the two teams will be charged and ready to go all out for their coaches.

Ryan continues to give his verbal wet-willies to the Patriots.  He couldn't resist criticizing their quarterback, Tom Brady,  for attending to a Broadway play instead of watching the Jets play last Saturday.   Meanwhile as expected, not one mumble has been heard from Belichick.   

"It's a level playing field," Ryan said.  "Now, it's coming down to me raising my level."

Maybe if he was raising his fork in a chili eating competition, I would bet on Ryan.  Oh wait, he had lap-band surgery.  I'll bet on Belichick in that contest too.

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